I can’t believe it’s been 4 months…

“The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.” 

– Toulouse-Lautrec, Moulin Rouge

I have a confession to make. I don’t think I’ve ever truly had a successful relationship. I would find out that it wasn’t going to work out early on like when an ex of mine called me the wrong name at an inopportune time, or when another ex was spending more time with my roommate than me, or when I realized another stopped calling but then I called him from a blocked number to be like yo what the hell is up? BUT for some stupid reason I’d have get this sick twisted notion that it might work out, that something might change, or whatever guy it was would realize we fit together. All of them failed. Till now…

 CJ & I have been together now for 4 months. I believed him when he said he came back into the bar we met at because he was hoping he’d see me again. I even went to the bar he went to after he asked me out to make sure I wasn’t dreaming & he had in fact asked me out to dinner. I’ve even had a surgery during the relationship & he still wanted to be with me. He’s the first guy to ever truly tell me he loved me. He’s the first guy that has actually made me feel like I have a true boyfriend who wants to be with me. It’s…this has all never happened before. First guy who’s wanted to show me the world…I am so happy it has happened. All of it.

He wanted to know if I thought there was potential for us to be long-term when I said I would date him. I was scared at first because this is my first true experience with a real love that was returned. I said yes. I actually think there might possibly be a potential here for something greater. I’m so not getting ahead of myself I want to take things slow even tho people are pushing me for information that I couldn’t possible give, but I can see this going far.

So this is what love is? Endless nights of talking, laughing, sharing our stories…snuggling together to keep each other warm, taking each other’s hand & giving it an extra squeeze just so they know you’re happy to be with them, playing video games til the wee hours of the morning, making each other breakfast, & making each other smile…if it is love then I’m in love. But more importantly, I'm happy. That I think is worth its weight in gold.

4 months. It seems like longer.  There will be some changes in our schedules because he will have class & I will have my cake decorating class & the winter will bring snow & it might be harder for us to make time for one another. I’m up for the challenge. I hope it works. I’m keeping my fingers crossed! =)

What is your definition of love? I’d love to hear…

CJ & me @ Octoberfest!

So Why Are All the Apples Gone??

Well Mr. Jack Sparrow might have had a problem with all the rum being gone but the town of Piermont, NY has a bigger problem. CJ & I after a great weekend of relaxing & TLC decided to go to a local apple festival to ring in the new season. I’ve been seeing signs for weeks for this Apple Festival everywhere. It was taunting me to go! So we went………….NOT ONE APPLE IN SIGHT!!!! What the hell? Who does that? It was basically a flea market with the usual hot dog & ice cream & the pickle man, but low & behold not one single apple. What a bust!! But I think it’s funny as hell. 

I was expecting you know some apple cider, maybe an apple press so you could see them make apple cider, maybe a pie eating contest or an apple pie, maybe an apple turnover or I don’t know a man dressed up as Johnny AppleSeed! Something to do with Fall or Apples. Nadda. Just jewelry & a few odds & ends. I even ran into a friend of mine who showed up & was like, “So where are all the apples?” Oh well, maybe I’ll write a letter.

What’s your favorite thing to do with Apples this Fall? =)

This week tho I’m definitely making an apple pie. I can’t wait to chop up some apples, add the brown sugar, roll out the pie crust, & enjoy some yummy goodness with a dollop of ice cream. Also I bought some apple cider. I love apple cider. I guess you can tell I’m happy it’s Fall? The last few lingering warm days has been such a treat, but it was so nice to just curl up in CJ’s arms & chill out. =)

While the apple festival sucked we did go walk around the town pier. There is so much to New York State that has nothing to do with Manhattan & sometimes the beauty of it all gets overlooked. I live near Suffern, NY the classic farm town from Sex & the City but there is NO FARMS IN THE TOWN! No sexy man on a tractor, no cabin in the woods, nothing like that at all. Just shopping centers & if you blink you’re out of the town. Hehe. No apple farms either. Anywho I'll do a post about that another day. Here are some shots I did take at the pier.

The Hudson River!

The lil shore line...

I just thought this tree was beautiful!

Back to work I go tomorrow. This week is Pay Day so I’m glad for that. I’ll be dreaming of warm apple pie tonight! Good luck everyone for this week! =)

What will be next on my crazy adventure?

Oh what will be next on this crazy adventure? When Alice fell down the rabbit hole she had no idea what would be behind that lil talking door. I actually like going into the weekends not knowing what’s going to go on because then you can just hold on & float through it. The pressure isn’t on you to complete this or that & maybe just maybe you’ll have a lil fun. I got nothing planned for this weekend except spending some drama-free time with CJ hopefully. We haven’t really had much alone time without somebody interrupting or calling or planning for us to be here or there. We need some TLC. There are a few autumn festivals & street fairs I might stop by at too to welcome in the fall season. I’m looking forward tho to next week for it holds some new adventures for me.

Part of my birthday present was my mom signing up for her Cake Decorating Class.  Yeah my mom is a Doll maker, quilter, & part-time cake decorator. She does a lot & on my kick to get some new hobbies to do in the winter so I don’t die of boredom I’m going to join in on the cake decorating fun! I’ve watched her decorate many cakes & even a wedding cake here or there so I’m happy I’m old enough to appreciate her talent now. I’ve been enjoying getting all my supplies & getting recipes for icing & looking for inspiration cakes. Cake Boss is now my favorite show.

I want to learn how to make an Icing rose. I think they are one of the prettiest things. Also my lil cousin whom I have barely any relationship with is taking the class with me!! I’m hoping that her & I will bond a bit & build some memories together. She’s 22 but she has her own life & I hardly see her or talk to her. Maybe this will be the lil push we need to re-connect. Who knows? But I’m going to keep my fingers crossed.

I STILL don’t know my closing date to move into my first condo but I know things are getting closer. I’m just waiting for the bank. I can’t wait to have tea parties, Friday movie night parties, lunches on the weekends, a girl’s night get-together, or a romantic dinner with reservations for two. Soon…

Well now that’s it for this week. I will going to be go to the gym tonight to continue my Weekly Goal. I’m on the move…be right back after these messages.

Don’t Forget to Enter My Giveaway! Click To Enter:

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Here are my Posts from the week In Case you Missed them!

Things I'm Learning with this Weekly Goal

This is Just How Small the World Really Is...

Free Range Melanie on the Loose

What a battle this Weekend Turned Out To Be!

Enter My CSN Stores Gift Card Giveaway!! =)

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Oh Another Giveaway!!!! CSN Stores Gift Card!!

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Things I’m learning with this Weekly Goal so far…

Honestly saying that you’re on a Diet is just a recipe for disaster. People say that if you label it, the pressure starts on you, the temptations begin to gnaw at you, and you start hating your fellow co-worker is sitting in front of you right now with Taco Bell for lunch. (seriously Scott your killing me right now with the smell…grrr). So instead of using that “D” word I set this weekly goal to be: Go Back to the Gym & Watch what I eat. Simple right? Well actually it’s been more successful so far then I thought it would be!

Monday & Tuesday I actually did get to the gym. Seriously I’m patting myself on the back right now. I didn’t over do it too which rocks cuz I’m not even in pain just a lil sore. I walked 2 miles each day & used some machines & did some stretches. I wish I could run it but having 2 fibroid removal surgeries from my right breast kinda puts a damper on that & having had my gall bladder removed almost a year ago. But it’s okay I’m actually getting a profitable work-out going on.

Here are a few things I’ve learned at the Gym that might help you out to do a lil something if you want to return to the gym.

1.) On Treadmills there is a button to increase “Incline”. DO IT! If you are on an incline you will actually burn more calories.

2.) Vary your speeds. For a quarter of a mile do fast then slow it up, then increase, then slow down. You will feel like your doing different things.

3.) You are not Arnold Schwarzenegger. It’s okay on the machines not to be able to lift 50lbs or so. Do not strain yourself.

4.) 15 reps, 3 times is more than enough on a machine without overdoing it.

5.) Music. You need it. Enough said.

6.) If your are at a weight machine & the weights clash down with a loud noise after a rep, the weight is too heavy for you.

7.) For a girl: Find a cute guy focal point. For a guy: Find a cute girl focal point. Watch them work-out & it’ll make the time go by real fast cuz you’ll be daydreaming.

8.) It’s okay to only go for 30 minutes. The notion you have to spend hours at the gym is really false. You’re not a body-builder so anytime spent at the gym is worth it.

9.) Stretching after you work-out let’s your muscles relax so you don’t get cramps.

10.) Just because you’re going to the gym doesn’t mean you can then eat more of bad foods. It should be a combo effort.

Just thought I’d share those few things with you while I had a break at work. I’m not going to the gym today because I think you do need time of rest. Tomorrow I’ll go back. Okay…just breathe…

Do you have any tips at the gym &/or eating to help me out sticking to my weekly goal?

Check out my last post too: This is just how small the world really is!!

This is just how small the world really is...

There is a saying that goes, "Wow what a small world" because there are everyday coincidences that will make you look to your left & make sure there isn't a camera rolling or a script in your back pocket. There is soo much truth to this saying that it's almost ridiculous in my case. One such coincidence starts with a girl by the name of Fiona that I think her & I are accidentally following the same boy train. There is over 200,000 people in my county but somehow her & I find the same losers. Well she's still stuck with the losers & I got my winner CJ. hehe. I'll explain.

This girl Fiona dated the Mess, my horrible ex. She also dated a guy by the name of Damien & a guy named Rob. Oh did I mention all 3 men dated me or tried to date me? Damien one day told me that Fiona & I looked alike. No we don't. She's got black hair, blue eyes, & weighs about 100 pounds because she does alot of drugs. I have brown hair, brownish red eyes, & weigh about 165 pounds & doesn't do drugs at all. Similar? Not really. The only thing that's similar is our height I guess. BUT what's the cherry on the top of us dating the same guys...she is now with the ex New Guy I was trying to date last March. What the hell?? Does anyone else think this is weird??? All the same guys? Weird?!?!?!

The funnier part is that Fiona & I aren't even friends. We did go to the same high school together but the times we've been in the same room over the past 10 years I think has been 2-3 times without ever speaking to each other. But I know that she is a bit trashy. If I was nice I could warn the ex-New Guy that she is not someone he should be around or warn her that he's awful but maybe they can be awful to each other & make it work. Who knows? lol. 

I'd thought I'd share this lil drama because I thought it was funny. 2 girls who barely know each other have each dated the same 4 guys. Weird?!?! I don't even know if she is aware of it too. Maybe I'll tell her one day...maybe not.  I think I need to move to Guam. No seriously, where I live is too small of world.

Do you know of any weird coincidences you've encountered lately? I'd love to hear...

Free Range Melanie on the Loose!!!

After the shenanigans of the weekend I needed a day for myself. Omg one girl can only take so many days of pure uncensored drama. Thursday to Sunday there was drama so I threw it all out the window & took a day off a work.  I was Free-Range, ready to go as I please. Sometimes you really need to get off the merry-go-round, take that day off of work if you can spare it, because it is refreshing & you don’t feel like you’re at such a dead run. It was a new start & I loved it. I feel refreshed & am ready to go back to work after my lil break. You have to smell the roses…they are there for a reason. Lol.

 

I would like to return to my Weekly Goals part I tried to start a few weeks ago. The first Weekly Goal was make a new friend. It wasn’t very successful over my trip to Maryland. I never had the “We should chill again” moment or the “Oh can I get your number” with CJ’s best friend’s girlfriend. It was okay because I didn’t want to push it. It’s so hard to make new friends I think after college, especially when you work with all guys. I guess I turned to my boyfriend’s friends to see if their girlfriends were friend lonely too. Oh well it didn’t work.

 BUT the world works in mysterious ways. Two other of CJ’s friends girlfriends over the weekend both asked me for my phone numbers, asked to add me on facebook, & told me they were happy CJ found a great girlfriend. They said they haven’t seen him this happy in years. I’m glad for that. One of them took pictures of CJ & me at Oktoberfest & she was like Oh don’t we look cool all together. It made me smile in my heart. I’m hoping for the best. Maybe they’ll call us to go movies here & there or go to mini golf or hell just sit & watch TV. Who knows but I think Weekly Goal = Accomplished.  Here’s the photo:

 

This week’s Weekly Goal #2 is inspired by my Free-Range status of the day. Go back to the gym & watch what I eat. I actually went to the gym this morning & walked 2 miles. I didn’t over do it, took things slow, & feel like I did something healthy. I LOVE my gym now because they updated their treadmills so they now have chargers for ipods in the lil console on them. EUREKA! Talk about motivation. I’m going slow but I want to lose 15 pounds over the course of the next 2 months. I think that’s a realistic goal. Let’s see what I can do.  My inspiration ladies are Jennifer Hudson & Marilyn Monroe. Ms. Monroe to remind me whatever size I wind up she was still beautiful in a size 14. Okay, here we go..

Do you have any goals for this week? If so I’d love to hear. 

P.S. I’ve been having some problems with blogger too lately. Has anyone had problems with their posts showing up in the Items reader on your Dashboard? Mine are horrifically delayed. Any help would be most appreciated too. =) Have a good day!

What a battle this weekend turned out to be...

This was the one of the weirdest & hardest weekends I’ve ever had. I’ve NEVER done so much running around & without one moment to just sit down & breathe. I’m completely overwhelmed & exhausted out of my mind. The second I had a time to relax was about 2 hours ago when I got home. It has been non-stop since I got out of work on Friday. CJ & his friends ran me so ragged I’m desperate for a few moments alone to myself. CJ & I’s relationship somehow also lasted through this weekend of fights & brawls, none of which we’re our own. Yeah I’ll explain.

This weekend became a couples’ retreat type of weekend which I’ve been craving but not the fights. EVERYONE one of the couples we hung out with either had fights, broke up & got back together, compared me to CJ’s exes, or had those stare downs where they were pissed at each other. My head was spinning from it all because I honestly don’t know these people that well. Each of his couple friends have been dating for years & they are arguing about cheating, babies, weddings, living situations, & taking those next steps in life. I’ve listened to so much drama that all I wanted to do was go home & curl up into a ball & not be in a relationship. I’m sorry to say but 3 couples fighting right in front of me over the course of 60 hours had an effect on me.

It’s only been 4 months between CJ & I but I feel like we are moving way to fast. His biological clock is ticking for the other steps of his life as well as his friends. Mine isn’t. I just turned 25. I’m prepared to be in love, give myself to another person, maybe get engaged in a year, & get married and have kids in another 2 or 3. But for some reason people are shoving it down CJ & I’s throats questions about this stuff. ITS ONLY BEEN 4 MONTHS!!! His mom asked if I would consider a destination wedding. No, I don’t even want to think about it til at least a year of dating. One of his friend’s girlfriends was upset she wasn’t married yet & she is almost 30 & has been dating CJ’s friend for 4 years & flipped out.  She was watching a wedding show & lost it in front of us all. One of the other guys was lying that he didn’t cheat when he did. Another of them is upset cuz the boyfriend was so horrible to her & she won’t leave him for what reason I don’t know. It was a disaster.

I had fun at some of the stuff but then the drama sliced it all up. I miss my boyfriend. I saw him all weekend with all these drama cases & barely spent any alone time with him. It was too muddied by his friend’s relationships & then he had family stuff on Sunday where he played with the lil kids &  I had to go too so I barely saw my parents or have a moment to even do my make-up properly. It was too much. Way too much. I’m going to take off tomorrow of work because I need a chance to recuperate. I need to be me for a day, not a girlfriend. I will also talk to him about this tomorrow ASAP. This weekend was too much. 

I did make 2 new friends in CJ’s friend’s girlfriends which rocked but I’lll talk about this tomorrow after I’ve had a chance to breathe. I feel like everything is in shambles. Sigh. New day…new start. Okay…see u tomorrow.