Tuesday, November 24, 2009

"What do you want from me?"


So everybody I took your advice & just tried to feel good today. I totally had a $15 off of $30 coupon, so I went to Express & bought 2 really nice good shirts. The above one is one of them. I dunno I kinda feel like a Fem-Bot in it. Ya know from Austin Powers? lol. Well I need some "Date" shirts. I don't have a full-length mirror in my house so hehe Express Dressing Room will have to do. =P

This morning I made myself get out of bed & straighten my hair again. I walked into work & Omg the 5 men I work with ACTUALLY gave me compliments on my hair & said I looked nice today. I gasped a little inside with some happiness.

While driving home from my lil shopping spree, the whole Adam Lambert thing was everywhere on the radio. His music, he can do what he wants to do, I guess. But...I really like his new song. The chorus rings, "What do you want from me?". I then thought, hmmm...what do people want from Me? What will a new guy want from me when he meets me? What does the Mess even want from me in this horrifically akward time betweeen us? What do my friends want? What would that ex that asked me to dinner want? What do you guys in blogger land want from me?

I'll try to answer these as best as I can:

To the Future Guys I will meet:
You will find a complex girl with tons of likes/dislikes along with all the dreams of the world, and she will try ever so hard at everything she does. When I smile, I'm smiling for real. She will go out with you & she will genuinely enjoy spending the time because it's time with you. I might enjoy that time so much that I might love you. She'll love the little things & the cherish the memories. And I will go see that horror movie with you but I will jump & scream but just put your arm around me, I'll be fine cuz I'll have you. I will even go to every Walmart in the tri-state area to find that toy I know you've been looking for just to see the happiness on your face one day. Oh and please remember I have feelings...that's a key to me. =)

To my Future Friends I will meet:
Oh I got your back girl or guy. I will be there for you just say the word. I will go out & have those gossip lunches & Omg will love them. Even if the times are over I will miss you...if for some reason our friendship fell apart even if it was the worst of circumstances, I will miss you. I will tell you, "Omg you can totally get a better shirt than that & you don't deserve that crap from that guy." I will totally wait in line for the next Twilight movie with you too.

To the people of Blogger:
I will try to be as honest as I can here and speak with my heart. I will try to put out my shoulder if I can, and relate to you if I can & help or root you on! This blog is me. I'm a lil random, I go off on tangents, and I try out a lot of different things, but that's all part of life. I make mistakes, I have my bad days, I regret things, I try not to make those mistakes again...I'm learning. I'm learning to be just me and it's quite a journey. (Oh and the above about Friends can be added onto this one as well.)


The other two questions I spoke of before about that boy & the ex...hmmm...I just don't know what to do with them. It's a battle of friend or foe. A battle that may be over or not. It's too weird to tell. Too odd to make a move or a call...Too akward. To hard to decipher the lies & decode the truth, or the so-called truth. It's not my fault that I thought it might mean something more...or is it?? Time will tell...

Well I hope you all are enjoying this short week. I know I am. I can't wait to come home tomorrow afternoon & sleep. I gotta prepare for Black Friday. lol. Yes, I am one of those crazies that goes out, BUT as a note I looked up you can get up to 5 Years in prison for fighting...even if it's just over a toy or purse. That'd be a funny conversation. "Why are you here?"..."Tax Fraud"..."Drive-by Shooting"..."Drug Deal"..."I took some lady down cuz she bought the last Rock Band"...LOL!! PLEASE BE CAREFUL!!!

Okay one more day at work...Defrost turkey...help mom with more baking...keep dressing nicely...Gotta keep this up...Okay talk to you guys tomorrow. *Hugs*

Title quote is from Adam Lambert's song, "What do you want from me".

"What a shame if all there is...is all thats gone away."
- The Birthday Massacre, "Holiday"

28 comments:

Valeriesoh said...

Very nicely written!!! please know that you are a beautiful lady, you don't need men to tell you that you are great....

val

tale of many cities said...

thanks for stopping by my random world! :) have a wonderful thanksgiving.
many blessings,
-Tracie

Elizabeth Marie said...

Yay glad you're feeling better-retail therapy and straightening the hair works wonders.

I love the letters. I love that you included the people of blogger hahaha...seriously, props to you for being honest. I heart the honesty. We're all on our own journeys, so we support you.

Happy Thanksgiving love.

Rachel Follett said...

Retail therapy! Woohoo! Love that top. Its super sexy and definitely fem botish. :)

ChinkyGirLMeL said...

We love ya sweetie. =) You can be totally random and jump from two totally unrelated topics but we'd still be here reading your blog. It's great that you took sometime to just feel good. Shopping does wonders in uplifting moods doesn't it? hehehe. Hope you have a great week ahead of ya. =)

LENORENEVERMORE said...

I feel you lady...
I'm quite complex too!
more interesting I think...
Thanks for your kind words, made me smile!
ps: love your profile photo~

xo*

supreem said...

lol, i tried doing the 'feeling good' thing recently, and it actually made me feel worse! But I'm happy it worked out for you :)

Elizabeth said...

Hilarious. I did not know that about the cost of fighting. I have never been out on Black Friday because I know I have temper issues. That would be just my luck.

E.K. said...

Sounds like you're doing better!

jayne said...

really cool post idea. you are so honest its refreshing. the world would be a lot better if people were as open as you are. I find one of the hardest things in life is the different expectations people have. whether its your good guy friend refusing to take your relationship any further than friends when all you wanted to do was go out with him (my life last feburary) or a new friend just viewing you as a mere acquaintance and not a new best bud. since you're this frank about what you want, need, expect no one can truly be disappointed and that's the best way to be. plus you sound like an amazing friend, girlfriend, etc. and I can definitely say you're an amazing blogger! I really appreciate your comments on my very long introspective posts, hearing your opinion really helps.

Secretia said...

You look Great. You probably get complimented every day. There's lots to be happy about. The best holiday to you!

Secretia

Bathwater said...

I don't think you will have a problem finding new guys with that attitude. Just look how the guys at work responded when you straightened your hair. You look good.

RFSP said...

Love your blog

Follow me
http://rfspblog.blogspot.com/

Girl in My Own World said...

Happy Holidays and hope that you continue to feel good! :o)

Barry said...

Melanie, you're too adorable sometimes! I love that you're so willing to make changes, that you're so down to earth and that you're not afraid to make mistakes and admit them.

Most of all I appreciate the support and encouragement you give everyone. Posts like this put a big stupid grin on my face every time.
Any man would be lucky to have you in his life.

B

Alicia (The Red Deer) said...

A breath of fresh air - I love this post.

OceanDreams said...

Hey sweetie, glad you went shopping and took the time to straighten your hair, sometimes the simplest of things can cheer us up! Never forget that you are beautiful, but more important we must learn to love ourselves. You are doing just this! You are a fantastic friend and will be a great girlfriend for the right guy too! I liked your letters, very heart felt. I hope you have fun baking and getting ready for turkey day. Thankful for you sweetie! XO!

Shauna said...

What a great post, who could ask for more from you? Looking great, btw!

Kate said...

What a great post and glad you are feeling happier. Kate

Constructive Attitude said...

Express is so cool. but so expensive!!

Jennifer Fabulous said...

First, I love that photo. The shirt is awesome (gotta love Express!) and your hair looks really pretty. :)
This is a great post. Everyone is complex, but the best kind of people are the ones who understand that they are. I wish we lived in the same town. Gossiping and laughing over a good lunch sounds heavenly right now!
I hope you are having a great Thanksgiving, Melanie!

Jack Daniel said...

You look like you're Italian....
And uhm, Adam Lambert kinda looks like he's your brother. :P

drollgirl said...

i hope you had a super holiday and that your black friday is fantastic!

and i know that any guy or any friend that makes it into your heart is pretty damn lucky. you sure seem like a wonderful person!

and thank you for the biopsy tip and for your comment. i really appreciate it!

Dustjacket Attic said...

Oh cute top.

Way to go with the hair babe, it all helps us be the best we can be.

Loved your honest notes, life is a challenge that's for sure ... But you're up to it.

Have fun baking and enjoy yourself,

Hugs back to you,
xoxo

PinkBow said...

retail therapy is the best there is!

jeff said...

I think... you try to find the impossible ! ! !... Don't change girl ! You're beautiful girl !... and then, the best will coming !... I don't speak very well in english !... Sorry miss !

See you...;-)
Ciao bella

jeff

radiogael said...

Hey there, thanks for the congrats!

I recently tried to feel good for a week (I'm a bit bi-polar so it's a conscious effort for me to do it) andfor some reason it works, even though it's exhausting.

Your photo looks lovely by the way, and your warning/disclaimer to future friends/boyfs and fellow-bloggers is excellent. We are all, and will be, very lucky to have an insight into how wonderful you are :)

Pixel Wild Child said...

Oh! We love your blog, the randomness of your thoughts and themes is what makes it that unique, and of course the fact that you take risk and get deep, I love that! (By the way,if 5 men can notice the change in your hair maybe you should consider straightening it more often! ;O))

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