Today the Cocoa Cola girl(gotta have my caffeine boost) went to visit the Dolly Mammas of the Ramapo Mountains. My mother and these very talented ladies make art dolls and do crafts. They were brainstorming ideas for their meetings and got my lil hamster wheel in my brain going. I showed them my lil sea shell box for show & tell and they Oooed. It made me happy. One of the ladies, Elizabeth, proposed formal brainstorming to another lady, Jan. That was the fire cracker that made me think. I acually sat and brainstormed ideas in my lil cherry notebook of blog ideas, a list of goals, mini projects I want to do learn like ATC cards, a list of pros/cons with the Mess(my Mr. Big), and just wrote my thoughts like a diary. I love to write. I love to write in script. Don't get me wrong I love my computer and my online livejournal diary but I love to get out the pen and write some pages.
In my lists I encountered not really immediate goals but long-term ones.
1.)I need another job that pays equal to what I make or more....(I'm going to a Resume workshop on the 22nd that I just can't wait for.)
2.)Save money for an apartment. I actually looked at an apartment later today and it was a big eye opener.
3.)Work on my friendships and find my old friendships
4.)Boyfriend- A real-life boyfriend...that will admist I'm his girlfriend, will tell his friends about me and might just might say I love you one day and mean it.
5.)Work on my skin...I hate sweating it happens and it ruins your skin.
The Good vs the Bad with the Mess list...that needs to remain silent. But all i can say with that is the list of bad's is a page long...=( Maybe Ill wake up for once and not pretend to be Carrie. I'm waiting for that end of the season moment that shows me it is completely over between us and for some reason I haven't gotten to the finale....Actually I think the show is stuck in re-runs becuz it's the same stuff different year, different time but same exact stuff with him & me. Ack...What a mess.
Anywho...I've made lists of To do's in this blog before and I'll admit one of my tragic flaws is procrasination. It's a horrible retched lil thing that plagues me so but you need a leaping off point to start things.
The opening credits of a movie will eventually end and the story must begin.
Now it comes to the title of this blog. What if it rained frogs? What an amazing metaphor. I've seen two movies lately where it rained frogs. "The Reaping" & "Magnolia". In Magnolia, the climax of the movie where everybody has reached their limit and their emotions and their frustrations have reached it's limit is symbolized by the raining of frogs. I think I'm having this moment. I'm trying to reach this starting point where I will see the sign, see the raining frogs and realize there must be a point of no-return and start this story. I have to chose a path and not look back. Don't forget, but keep going. Persevere. Run like the wind and not be a lazy procrasinator.
I thought & wrote today I'm ready to take the next steps in my life. I've kinda danced around taking these steps for the past month and I'm tired of waiting. I've had the melt-downs, I'm in the process of cleaning up these fallen frogs on the roadside, and I must go on. If I write it, I'll beleive I can do it. If I keep reminding myself Yes...just a lil more time needs to go by, and then things will be different. Yes I will turn that other corner. I want the story to start, and cleaning the bedroom wasn't enough. I have to physically & mentally do it. Okay. Monday, that's a day of new beginning.
Also, geez if it really truly rained frogs.....Omg that'd be one hell of a cleanup. lol.
The sky will be my limit. Maybe just maybe I'll go further...
I took this pic today outside of DePiero's farm in Park Ridge, NJ. The clouds just go on and on. I thought it was beautiful.