Well today kinda threw me for a loop. I've been dating my boyfriend now for about 2 months & everything is going better than I can ever imagine. But then today happened. So I invited CJ over for dinner tonight & as we were sitting he pulled this rabbit out of his hat...
Uhhh what? I asked him why & he kinda didn't give me a straight answer. He didn't break up with me but I took his head in my hands & gave him a huge kiss to try to make him feel that I want to be with him. All through the night he was like "How are you Mel?" & "Am I enough for you?" & "Are you sure your happy?". My head is in spins right now.
I bought him the Mets tickets this weekend I went with him & I joined him in Chicago. I faced my fears for him to go on a plane, I've gone to numerous family events with him & I'm trying to be affectionate but not clingy so I'm at a loss at the moment. I keep saying I'm so happy & that I'm so lucky to have him too. I hugged him real tight & kissed him goodbye tonight & made plans for Wednesday night so I'm like huh? I wonder who maybe telling him that I'm out of his league?? I have NEVER mentioned that I even had a doubt about him & he's all like, "Maybe we'll change, people change". It's only been 2 & half months so I don't know why he's freaking out?
He did tell me he's falling for me hard. Maybe he's scared that I won't love him back? I don't want to pull the "Love" card so soon in the relationship but maybe I have to. I put that we were official on facebook & tagged myself with him so I don't know what else to do for him to prove to him I want to be with him?? I snuggle up with him & laugh with him watching movies so I'm really puzzled.....I did act a lil tired this weekend & kinda passed out while he was playing the guitar so I hope he doesn't think I bore him? He said I act formal by inviting him over for dinner instead of just telling him, be here for dinner at 6:30. But I find it polite? Isn't it?
I told him he was the best boyfriend I've ever had which is the truth. I told him I'm so happy with a huge smile on my face & I try to kiss him with feeling. What else can I do? It's like he's preparing for me to leave even tho I'm not going anywhere. I don't get it. I don't think I've given him one single inkling that I want out so what's up with this? He's my lobster. He might be my other half I've been searching for & I'm freaking out because I want to keep him.
I need a lil help here. If not advice, maybe a similar story & what you did? Beyond the obvious how do you assure to your boyfriend that your his girl? I want to be with him & only him. Saying it with a big passionate kiss isn't enough apparently???