After all the hours of working, partying, & thinking are done I am left to stare out my window waiting for the possibilities of my actions. I keep sparingly mentioning a New Guy in my life...well I think its about time I told you a lil more about him.
Frankly I don't know what he is right now. He's the guy who him & I are having a few stolen moments ever now & again over the last few weekends, when everyone has left & it's just him & me. His kisses have been the balloon that has carried me back to the Earth with my two feet on the ground. However there is a good side to him, as well as a bad side. (btw, I've come to the conclusion that nothing will ever be easy in my life, especially my love life). So I'll shed some light on the goods & the bads of him & maybe you can help me see if the goods outweigh the bads.
-If he's going out drinking he'll call a cab for the night. Never drinks & drives.
-He kisses me so deeply that he's wearing my eye-liner at the end of the night.
-He notices that I have switches in my personality...he can tell when I'm mad, upset, happy, or frustrated.
-He's tall & handsome like he has a beard that's somehow soft.
-I actually like the band he plays the drums for (I don't really like Drummer Boy Ex's band at all)
-He let me make a playlist on his computer just for the time we spent together.
-He will buy me drinks & tries to feed me when i go to his house
-He lives with 2 other guys but technically has his own place.
-Got a great job in a Union that he cares about & knows he has to show up for work.
-He keeps a photos of his family in his bedroom & shows me his nephews pictures.
-He does call me pet names.
-Will ALWAYS take a shower before we all come over so he smells really good.
-He likes movies & actually cuddles & will turn my face to his if he wants to kiss me.
-He doesn't sleep. He thinks nothing of being up til the sun comes up. I think he might take Aderol or something to keep himself awake. That could be a problem.
-I never see him during the week or hear from him.
-He called me last Saturday night at 5am to pick him up & his roomate to take him home after his night of partying without me. He said he didn't have enough cash for a cab & wanted to see me...yeah right.
-He's a cigarette smoker, but he does have really white teeth & pops alot of gum.
-He's a biter. I like to keep my flesh on my bones without lil markings. He doesn't give hickies he leaves bite marks. SO I guess he's a wolf marking his territory?? I dunno its starting to piss me off. Why not just ask me to be your gf instead of biting me?
-I always see him when we're all going out so he usually has a beer in his hand.
-He has trust issues apparently from a really bad ex.
-He is a teddy bear with a chainsaw. We have already had 2 fights & we're not even dating yet.
-He's bluntly honest, but he will tell you when you look like shit which will make me feel like crap.
-He's a bit of a gossip whore. He wants to know everything that it's not even my place to tell.
-Oh yeah & he is another drummer...i've had bad history with drummers.
-Hates girls who wear sneakers & that's usually what I wear
Soooo yeah, as you can see there are reasons why I haven't really talked about him because I'm the on the fence with this New Guy. From writing all the out it really seems like I'm just the girl at the end of the night who just happens to be there so it's falling into place. But...then again I still don't know him well, this might be the beginning stages of something or just a fling that's keeping my sanity a lil in check. I don't know. All I know is I will keep my eyes open. I'm not going to be blindfolded by another creep. No way.
It's hard to even come up with a Nickname for him? Drummer Boy II? Teddy Bear with a Chainsaw?(I like that one) Idiot? Fence Boy, cuz I'm on the fence with him? Wolfie, cuz of the biting? I dunno. I'm not even sure if its worth giving him a nickname at this rate. Time will tell.
I really just wish I could find someone to stay. Someone, who like the 50's song, will love me tomorrow. It seems that SOME guys are just in the moment these days & when the dawn of light peeks through the truth comes out or your left to go home alone to once again start the search. I should see this guy this weekend again so I think I'm going to bite the bullet & ask him "What's going on with us?". I got NOTHING to lose because right now I have nothing. I hope he's on his best behavior next time I see him. I hope...
26 comments:
Hey Mel :)
... :O). If I'm just being straight honest, his "Goods" don't really at all out weight his "Bads" :( Whereas, he notices distinctive things about you (which is a PLUS actually, considering how most guys ignore those IMPORANT thangs) has a good job etc BUT he still apparently has PAINS (almost like he's the guy who misses up a relationship to keep from getting hurt) from the old GF, AND the fact that he SMOKES just killed ALOT. Smoking is a no-no... :(
He needs more time to heal and regroup. Oh and he's another.....drummer boy . Basing off of what you've told in the pass about these "Drummer boys" should be a sign. If you want to be friends (which he won't want to just be friends aha--none of them do) OK, but definitely NOT in a relationship.
Have a groovy day :)
ha! i like the eyeliner bit. Dear, dear. i think only time will tell if he is the right one for you. For now, enjoy his company and have fun together...
Just letting you know that i'm hosting a giveaway at my blog at the moment, and would love for you to enter! http://trishiekoh.blogspot.com/2010/03/picos-skirt-giveaway.html
A.) Love the title. Love that song. ^_^
B.) It's early yet, and communication is key. See what you both want, and make sure you talk.
C.) Basing a relationship on what kind of shoes a girl wears is not exactly foolproof. If it's meant to be, he'll get over the sneakers.
D.) The fact that he has nephews is jumping out at me, so I keep wanting to throw Uncle Drummer, or Uncle something out there. That might be a little creepy though.
oh lady....this takes me back to the dating days...i hope that this weekend gives you some clarity! and man...i'm racking my name for a nickname but nothing is coming to mind!
It is most likely that what you see in him will not change. So you might as well enjoy the good parts and minimize the bad ones.
Secretia
that is a neat paining.. i thought you'd write about your zombie project this time around.. still not settled with a pet name.. com on.. how tough could it be.. you could try to google for one. you get most things if you google for it. even love in some cases :P.. thats a pretty damn long list. how do you do that? but that is pretty cool. take it easy , keep your cools and you'd be fine :)
Aw, the good things sound really sweet though. And that's great you're keeping your eyes open, maybe you should have that "what are we" talk with him. Or wait a bit longer and see how things go.
drummer boy 2. :/
Oy. Good luck with the decision
Everyone has their good side and bad side. I certainly wouldn't give up on yet, but keep doing what you are doing--keep your eyes open, and back away if necessary.
Hey Mel. Hmmm... I dunno about this New Guy. I'm sure you're still weighting things. If you do plan on seeing him, do keep your eyes wide open. If you have a gut feeling that he might not be good for you well go with that feeling. It's best to leave soon before you get too attached and you end up missing him like crazy.
Be careful with this guy Mel. We don't want history to repeat itself with drummer boy the 2nd.
Take care sweetie. =)
The thing that would really bother me is the not talking/see one another all week. Seems strange not to at least talk. So if there's not a good reason for that there would be alarm bells.
The 5am calls are also not cool if it happens to much. Trust issues aren't great, but they can be worked through.
I can't fault the dude for not sleeping because I often do the same thing and I'm not on anything. I think, it cases like these, the decision really has to come from you. Just be really clear and honest with yourself. How much can you deal with? Everything is a matter of degrees (ie: nothing wrong with fighting/disagreeing, I actually prefer someone who can speak up and tell me what's on his mind even if I don't agree; however if he fights dirty or gets really crazy angry that is a whole different story).
Good luck!
In my opinion the bad things definitely outweigh the good things. The bad things seem like they could be serious issues, drugs, smoking, biting, fighting. I don't know, give it time but I wouldn't get too attached. I hope things work out. The best advice I have is don't make yourself available after 1am.
Ugh! After reading the Goods I was so happy for you and then I read the Bads. You're completely too good for him; and if you don't show him that right from the beginning, he's going to take advantage, and things are going to go awry immediately. Like Katy said...don't make yourself available after 1:00am - he needs to run on your schedule, not on his own crazy one! :)
I'd say take in stride and see what happens. You definitely want someone who is going to be there for you and have things in common.
I was happy when reading the goods, but the bads made me wary.
Good luck girl. You deserve only the best!
He sounds like a d...elightful person. He smokes, bites, and "...he will tell you when you look like shit". Sounds like a keeper!
JM
This guy doesn't sound like much of a prize and doesn't sound like he respects your time either. I say, hang out, but don't give him any ideas that you want to date him.
Already there are this many things 'bad'....I don't think soooooo.
You deserve better. And someone that respects you and your time!
My favorite Tumblr girl by far, Love that you visit me at the swing, returning the favor, but have to catch up........
No man is worth misery you hear me, not one!
You will find one to stay, I promise, pinkie swear!
He kisses me so deeply that he's wearing my eye-liner at the end of the night.
I love that line- what an amazing way to describe a kiss!!
Fence Boy. For some reason that really makes me laugh, so I'm hoping that's what you go with.
I dunno. If there's one thing I can't tolerate in life, it's being woken up. So if a 5AM in the morning call comes in it better be life or death and not 'I went out without you and now that the night is over I now want to see you'.
And I really need to get to know a girl well before I just start biting her...so there's that too.
I want things to work out for you, so I'm not going to say no. I'm going to say, go with it for now and see what happens as long as you can keep from getting too emotionally invested. But don't be afraid to lay down a few ground rules. Better to do it now than try to get him to change weeks or months from now.
Good luck!
I always seem to end up with the "just in the moment" guys . . . I hope this guy isn't one of them. :)
The good are very sweet but be careful of those bads...especially Aderol...that def can be a BIG problem, which I sadly know from expirence. Not me but expirence with guys.
Thanks for your thoughtful comment and I'm loving this post xxoo :)
http://hopechella.blogspot.com/
well, i didn't want to write this on the last post, but the no sleep is very troubling. all the folks i used to know that didn't sleep were on drugs. crank. meth. whatever you want to call it. sleep is very important, so even if he is NOT on drugs, something really weird is up with that.
i am not trying to be a judgemental prick here, but i would proceed with caution. you deserve a super guy that you aren't 50/50 on. i have to tell myself the same damn thing, so please don't feel bad.
time will tell dear
at the mean time just have fun together!
xoxo
Hey Mel, you've certainly had your share of challenges with the boys you meet!
The first thing that comes to my mind with this guy is he's a partyer who has some maturing to do. I think your idea of the talk is a good one. If there's one thing I think your dating experience has taught you it's to trust your instincts.
Time will tell how much respect he has for you but I have my reservations. Then again, I think a guy would have to be exceptional to be good enough for you.
Thanks for the comment you left on my blog, I've been thinking about it a lot. I'm glad you've been able to take something from my writing, thoughts and experience.
I've learned from you too, you've been a constant reminder to me that we should never settle for less than we deserve.
I hope things go well with your talk. Don't take any bullshit from this guy.
Post a Comment