Who needs Ihop...I can make it myself!!

Well, try to make it myself.


Today I went to another demo at William Sonoma. Thats a lil collage I made of the some of the demo. This one was about Crepes. Crepes are those lil think french pancake thingies. I've never really been a fan of them because EVERY time i ever went to Ihop I got ridicolously sick. I don't have a bad stomach but without fail I get seriously ill from that place. Well not anymore!! I'll make my own. It wasn't the usual teacher so this lady seemed a lil scattered but it was still intersting. I'm becoming known as the Cocoa Cola girl because I always get one before showing up. Well it's early on Sunday mornings and I need more caffeine.

Well you can find really good recipies for crepes and things at William Sonoma. OH!! I know the William Sonoma;s in NY and NJ have these demos but i don't know if its everywhere. BUT!! They are doing an Espresso, Cappuccino, or Coffee Anyone demo...I'm hooked. I must go. Free Coffee!! Woohoo!!! I got offered a part-time holiday job there. I might take the offer. Not sure tho. I could use the money for future-apartment fund. hmmm....*thinking*

These demos are making me feel like I'm watching the opening of the remake of the Stepford Wives. Ya know that scene in the beginning where you see all those scenes from the 50's & the 60's conventions. That's one thing I wish I could go to. A World's Fair. My parents have told me that they were just amazing to see all new futuristic things. I wonder why the world stopped doing that?

Side Note: I wonder when the world especially certain people also stopped caring about each other's feelings. A little birdie told me information last night that just hit me like a ton a brick. I knew the information already but when you hear it from somebody else it hits home. I have to realize I'm not Carrie Bradshaw and Big won't come back in the end. My Mr. Big( I call him "the mess") didn't stop his chase when he met me. I can't understand why he still talks to me when he doesn't want to see me? If we were just friends and that was it to him, he would tell me Im sorry I'm dating someone else but I still want your friendship. It would give me closure. I'd cry, maybe hit a pillow, but I'd get over it because there would be closure. But no. I get lies. I get, "Oh I havent been up to much, just chillin in his job parking lot & then go to bed". That's a lie. I never thought I could meet a man who could be so cruel. I would & have walked the line for this kid...and yes i mean kid, even though he's older than me. I have to give up the ghost. I have to stop waiting for him to come back. Maybe just maybe if I'm not there......he'll understand. Maybe this just needs to be a fade out. I just have to let it go...But its hard. Ever so hard. But ya gotta take it one day at a time and just march time. I HATE that expression, but it's all that left to do. The one thing I have never done is leave. Perhaps if I left I'd be missed? In all honesty probably not. Soo I just gotta let time pass cuz eventually the smile will come in some shape & form. I hope.


Back on track. I realized that Im Preparing. It's almost like I'm doing a "nesting" thing, which is kinda weird. Im basically preparing myself for new people to come into my life. New friends, New guys, just New. I'm trying to find out what makes me happy, what makes me tick, who is this character that I am and what lets me forget the world. Thats why Im going to demos. Thats why Im trying to do a craft a week. That's why I'm buying lil pieces of flare. When someone asks, "Who are you" I want to give them an answer. Also when I go on job interviews which i need to start, and they ask me, "So tell me a lil bit about yourself" I won't studder and go Oh No what do i say?? I want depth. I want to get rid of the, "I just don't know what to do anymore" feeling. I don't want to be a Stepford Wife version of me. I want to be the real me. Maybe I'll buy a GPS it'll help me find me? lol. I'm lost. kinda like Stitch in Lilo & Stitch, but he was found. And I will find myself too n someone will find me. *Keeping fingers crossed*

I want to date a guy who would take me somewhere so I could have a reason to buy this dress: It's Jessica McClintok!:


Absolutely gorgeous. lol. I saw it before the demo and had to take a picture! I'm not that big of a Jessica McClintok fan but I'm in love with this dress. If there is ever an Enchanted by the Sea Dance like in Back to the future I want to go!

Okay stuff to do this week: #1: go back to the gym. #2: Make my own crepes #3: Move on with my life.

I'm liking those plans. =) After all, "Tomorrow is another day." - Scarlet Ohara, Gone with the Wind.

Hope everyone has a good week.