Sometimes people tell you things while they are living in that heartbeat of the minute. It might blind-side you to laughter, tears, smiles, or even the look of shock. At some point at the concert last week I looked up at CJ with his arm around me & asked him, “Do you still like me now that you know what type of music I like?”. I expected a look & the eventual yes. I didn’t get that answer. I got this:
My eyes went wide . I’ll admit a secret to you all. I’ve NEVER been told that before by any boyfriend or lover I’ve ever had. The Mess one day said, “I love you too” without me saying it first so that doesn’t count. In the 7 real years I’ve been truly dating those 3 words always escaped the situation. I once said it to an ex but then got the sound of crickets. BUT in the beginning of my 25 years I actually found someone who loves me. So I thought...
Later that night CJ was acting weird. Before we went to bed he then told me he had a confession to make. I freaked. I thought he was going to tell me he saw me talk to the Mess, but no it wasn’t that. He was squirming for the words. He told me he was scared to say this but then admitted he told a Lie. The words left his mouth a lil shakily.
This is what I was used to. A million thoughts raced through my head in the moments. Maybe some more time we will love each other or what did I do wrong or…or maybe…or maybe…BUT he wasn’t finished. He continued…
I hugged him & said, “I love you too.” I think I do love him. Wow yeah. I think I do. I feel like such a fool that I put up with other guys crap hoping they would love me if I stayed around. Sad I know, but I learned. But now I’m in unchartered territory for me. That word, “Love” has never been an equal factor in any of my relationships. He loves me. Wow. I was wondering how or what would happen that would make one of us said it. Now all he does is say it & I say it back.
Last night I went to his house & he said “I love you” & I said, “I love you too.” I forgot about all the chaos with the condo, my job, & the world. This is so new & I’m going to hold on for the ride.
The winner of my Mini Random Giveaway is: #10: ANGIE from Cinema Obsessed!! =) Email me when you get a chance so I can send it out too you! Thank you everyone! New Giveaway soon! =)