Wednesday, March 9, 2011

I Still Get Nervous Around Him…Isn’t that a Good Thing?


It’s brought to me attention the other night by my boyfriend that I’m still nervous around him. Naturally after knowing someone and dating them for 10 months they are going to pick up on your lil nervous habits and notice when you are doing them constantly. One of mine is talking too much. I have a bad habit of talking his ear off about everything under the sun BUT I don’t know if I’m really nervous around him or I might just be nervous about what I’m talking about…I’ll explain.

Of course I am a nervous about my relationship because this is the first time in my entire life where I’m in a healthy relationship that’s really working out. It’s healthy, we don’t really fight, we’re not cheating on each other, I’m happy to see him when I do, we are building a life together and I’m nervous because this is COMPLETELY UNKOWN TERRITORY FOR ME! Things are working out so forgive me if I want it to keep it that way and sometimes it can be stressful to be here, there, make decisions affecting both of us, and making sure each of us are still happy.


I’m nervous because eventually I want to ask him to move in with me into my condo but it might be too small for both of us so in that it might create a problem. I’m nervous that when we do fight it will be about something big and it might tear us apart. I’m nervous for those nights that cater to certain darkened room activities because I have put on a lil weight and I guess I’m self-conscious. I know he loves me and my curves but I wish I was a lil toner. I’m nervous that I’ve already told him a story, but for the life of me I can’t remember telling it so he’ll get mad that I’m repeating myself.

But aren’t these all normal reasons to be nervous?

Also on the other side of all of this my life has been going through a 360 spin with the job and condo so the stuff I’m talking about is nerve-wracking. He might be thinking that ALL the nervousness is about him but it’s not. Also it doesn’t help that we both have A.D.D so our attention spans can be thin. He might have switched to the next topic where I’m still fretting about it or vise versa so in that he might think I’m nervous about him when I’m not.

I guess a solution to all of this is to stop talking so much to him, but then I’ll feel like I’m not being open and honest when I’m saying an abridged portion of stories. I have to be more secure in myself and my choices too, but that doesn’t come over night. I gotta work on a few things but I think its good that a guy still makes you nervous right? I see it as a good nervous…not a bad. I’m nervous for the good things that are going to happen. That’s okay, right?


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19 comments:

Krysten @ After 'I Do' said...

I remember how nervous I was when I asked Dustin if he wanted to move in together. We'd been together less time than you two and I was scared that he think we were moving too fast.

Lucky for me he didn't think that and the next month we moved in together. It was a transition for sure but still wonderful.

And here's a secret. Every now and again I still get nervous around him for weird reasons. And we've been together 5 and a half years now!

The Shanner of Attention said...

It's no doubt he loves you for who you are. Be yourself. Even if you are nervous talkative chick. :)

Johnny Madrid aka Tim E. said...

That is so sweet, you still get nervous around him. That's normal though. Don't worry too much about things. If you are mad at him just talk to him about it, don't hold anything back, doing so will hurt the relationship a lot more. Just, enjoy this. I'm pretty sure you two will do fine. Stand by each other during the good times but also during the bad times. Your at the start of something wonderful. Don't question it, savor it :)

Diana Mieczan said...

I think its all natural and did you just say that you want to ask him to move in with you? That is HUGE and totally wonderful:) That is one of those good things to be nervous about:) You are doing great:) Kisses

Ps: I’m hosting a charming jewelry GIVEAWAY today! Hope you’ll join in:)

Dancing Branflake said...

Nerves are so important because otherwise we get complacent. I say embrace the nerves and use them to your advantage!

ag. said...

I think it's a good nervous!! In my opinion, it just means you care. Don't change who you are...just embrace it! I think it's important to continue to be open and honest and as long as CJ is in the loop on how you feel, then hopefully you're both able to discuss those feelings and get through all these good things in your future!

TT's Attic said...

That is so cute that he still makes you nervous - lucky girl! :)

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Pearl said...

Thats so cute. I've been married almost 4 years and I still get nervous around my man..especially when hes out of town..I'm getting butterflys just thinking about it.. Its sweet. And so is your Blog!

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Pearl

P said...

I've only been with my boyfriend for a month or two, despite knowing him for years, but I still identify with this post. I get nervous about the silly things too. He has commented before at times that I don't talk much. I think it is also because I'm worried I might repeat myself.

Still it's better to feel like that than NOT feel like that, right? It's a GOOD kind of nervous, and even though it scares me a bit, I'm trying to embrace it.

Jennifer said...

Totally normal, chick. Don't stress it. And a good boyfriend listens even when you do talk his ear off, because that's part of the job description. :) Even if you are stressed or nervous right now about several things, he's there and he loves you and in the end, that's all that matters. :D You'll still be worried about stuff, but you won't have to worry about him.

Olivia Juliann Crabtree said...

This is so cute and awesome! I think it's great you feel that way, it just shows how much you care about him! It will all work out and in the end, all those things bring people closer together :)

http://adailyolive.blogspot.com/

Audrey Allure said...

I agree, it's a good type of nervous & totally normal :) I still get a little nervous around my boyfriend who I've been dating for over 2 years. lol

Dionne said...

I think it's normal that you're nervous. You care, and you want everything to last, so I would feel the same.

As for being worried about a fight - Brian and my first fight made us so much stronger. I was glad that we went through it, actually. In fact, every time we have a fight, we are sooo much closer after it because we learn about each other even more. Sounds weird, but fights can actually be good.

BABI said...

i feel the same thing too with my hubby! i guess it's natural especially when you're in love! sweet post! :-)

http://whenbabispeaks.blogspot.com

Bathwater said...

And here I thought the best part of being in a relationship was not being nervous all the time. Are you sure you are doing it right. Maybe you need to stop worrying.

iloveyouvalentine said...

i think it's a natural thing to be a little nervous. sometimes i fall into this weird nervousness that cuts out my thoughts and i'm left with an awkward silence when i'm with the one i love. hahaha. it was embarrassing at first and still is, but now that he knows about it we always joke now if it happens. so i guess it's like the opposite with us!

but good nerves can be exciting. just don't let them turn into a bad thing :)

Amanda said...

Being in a healthy relationship with another human being is a natural thing. Somewhere in there you do know what to do. Trust yourself and your instincts.

haze said...

oh my dear Melanie! being nervous is fun! i told my boyfriend yesterday that it's amazing how i still get butterflies in my stomach whenever he whispers i love you in my ear or when he unexpectedly appear in my house... i love being nervous around him, because it only mens that i'm still in love with him....




i love this post, darling. and i love you too!

Alicia (The Red Deer) said...

I don't think it is a bad thing - but it certainly won't last forever. I was with my husband for 6.5 years and I think for the first year I was a little nervous around him and then I gradually chilled out. It'll happen at some stage.

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