Friday, June 4, 2010

For the times they are a changing....


On Wednesday night, the second date, I got in CJ’s car after he opened the car door for me, placed that huge Care Bear on my lap & then listened to his ipod. That’s when he turned on Bob Dylan’s “The Times they are a-changin” & it couldn’t have been a more appropriate time to hear that song play. Things are completely different & I’m starting to like it. The big CareBear is what he won for me at Dave N Busters. He used his own tickets & wanted me to have something to remember the awesome night of mini golf, ice cream, & video games. The awkwardness of the dreaded first date with a new person dissipated & I think we got a lil more comfortable with each other. He took my hand to lead me to play “Mrs. Pac Man” & “Deal or No Deal” & it flowed. The end of the night kiss…flowed too. He apparently is a very nervous man so he was fumbling his words for the 3rd date, so I just grabbed him by the shirt & kissed him again to stop the stuttering. It was a pretty good 2nd date & I’m so glad we decided to do something more casual. One thing I love to do in a relationship is play. You gotta play with each other, you gotta like each other, you gotta get comfortable. So…what next?

The weirdest thing about CJ is that his mom works with my father. What are the odds of meeting some random guy at a bar & him knowing your father!! I’m still hung up about it. But he’s still new. Oh so new. I hardly ever get to the first date with a guy, little alone a second or third so I guess this one might be a serious. I have to think of things…Perhaps I’ve been hurt, strung along, locked in the friend zone, or just been treated too badly to not have to sit back & be like: Do I really want do this with him??

My friend Erin brought to my attention that I’m probably going through my quarter of life crisis now. That deserves its own post tho. I’m going to be 25 years old in about 2 months. I haven’t given it much thought til today actually. I was telling her about CJ & I was looking for a dress for our 3rd date & I was so indecisive she had to help me out. I was stuttering myself & fumbling my words. I guess I’m nervous too with him. Almost 25 & all the sorta relationships I’ve had have been disasters or wind up just being that I hooked up with a guy for a while but nothing became final. This will be my First REAL Adult Relationship. I’m not talking about sex or experiences; I’m talking about the relationships where he might come over for Sunday dinner with the family. I mean a real relationship with the title of boyfriend & girlfriend. A relationship where it might mean something…


I’m going to give it a chance with him. I want to know his favorite color, know what stores he’s likes, what is his favorite childhood memory, what he thinks about before he goes to bed, what are his dreams like, would he take me to the zoo, find out if he snores, what it’s like to make out with him more than the few seconds we have, find out other than Terminator 2 what his favorite films are, & then, & then… While we were sitting eating our ice cream I accidentally got my hair that frames my face in my mouth & he moved it away for me. I wonder what sweet moment will be next. You gotta take that step.

I march to the beat of a different drum…I think he does too. Maybe it’ll work, maybe it won’t, but I going to try. I’m going to put myself out on that limb for a little bit & see if I want to stay. Regardless of anything, I won’t forget him because I now have 3 foot tall Care Bear. Hehe. btw...Thank God it's Friday!!! =)

Title: Bob Dylan’s “The Times they are a-changin”. Thank you Bob for writing that kickass song.

37 comments:

Bernadine said...

Awwww... this is so sweet. :) I really hope it works out for you two!!

Nitin said...

wow.cool.. so this seems like is flowing in the right direction :D

Barbara von Enger said...

Sounds like he's a solid fellow, do give him a chance. I think it's very sweet of him to presented you with that care bear - just look at the colours. Green for nature and blue to calm. He obviously gave it much thought. Don't worry about the fact that he works with your Papa, if he's a decent fellow, he'll do just fine. XOXO

Same Sweet Girl: Memoir of a Southern Belle said...

Awww!!!! Sounds like a marvelous time! You know it sounds to me like you should stop being so concerned about whether it will work out or not and just HAVE FUN! Fun is what it's all about!! :) That Care Bear is so cute!!!

just call me jo said...

Ahh, twenty-five(almost) and hopeful--I almost remember those days. Just relax and enjoy. If it's supposed to be something solid, it will grow. I want you to find peace and joy. This stage of life is so marvelous--lots to happen. Go with it...

tess said...

Regardless of what happens with CJ, I think the fact he is your first truly adult relationship is a good step and most definitely a step in the right direction. Maybe CJ will turn out to be amazing, the next great love, or he could just be another boyfriend in the end, but whatever he happens to be he will move you forward in your dating world, to something bigger and better, something you deserve after all of these previous jerks you never deserved to deal with

As far the whole quarter life crisis goes, sometimes I swear that's an urban legend. This time of our life basically 18-30 is tough for everyone, so much is happening and not happening at the same time. You're trying to figure out your life- what job do you really want, who do you really want to stay friends with, who do you want to fall in love with, yet still these 12 years kind of seem like a free for all, do whatever you want it doesn't matter yet because you aren't tied down by a true career or family yet. I think its natural to waver and have moments of self doubt wtf am I doing with my life? moments. Its too easy to label it as the stereotypical quarter life crisis. I just think it is plain and simply life, Melanie.

Unknown said...

life is very strange this way..I ended up marrying a guy who grew up around the corner from the house my parents moved into while i was in college. I knew his parents for two years before I ever met him and here we are 9 years later and about to have our first baby.

oh, and yes, Bob Dylan rocks!

LenoreNeverM♡re said...

That's lovely...give him the chance!
My bff's parents also work together for so many years. Sometimes I wonder how they do it as well!
xo

Bathwater said...

Crisis can come at any stage of life, they don't need to be brought on by an age that is just silly, who actually acts their age anymore.

Lila said...

Yes, give him a chance!
He sounds so thoughtful, sometimes when we have had bad relationships in the past we think that is the way they are suppose to feel and turn away a good thing. Don't turn it away!
Glad you seem to be feeling better.

Cafe Fashionista said...

Awww...Melanie, I am SO INCREDIBLY HAPPY FOR YOU! I couldn't help but to smile the entire time I read this post. You deserve someone absolutely amazing; and I think that CJ sounds fantastic! I'm so glad he's wining, dining, and having fun with you - the two of you already sound adorable! :)

Little Ms Blogger said...

Why do woman over analyze and men just take things as they come? It's not fair. Because you'd probably just be able to relax and have fun.

noone said...

cute story, that is weird that your parents know each other! I wonder if they talk about you guys?! and nice to hear that you had a wonderful date & kiss!

C'est La Vie said...

dating can be so darn stressful, it sounds like it's going pretty well so far :) i hope it does, i hope he treats you well and i hope that you are so happy you can't even stand it

xoxo
sara

are you feeling betteR?

a little black cloud in a dress said...

I had a 1/4 life crisis too,. that ended in divorce! haha. And if my fiance had played Bob Dylan on our second date, I'd probably have proposed to him!! lol

Heather Rose said...

So excited for you! He sounds really sweet, Mel.

I've never actually dated-dated, so I have no idea how any of it is supposed to work. I'm so candid, I'd probably scare most boys off.

All I know is that you deserve to know what his intentions are, before you get in too deep.

Rich Life Revival said...

SO CUTE :)

He seems like a sweetheart!! I love the Carebear...so thoughtful!

I think you should totally give it a chance and see where things lead :)

Diana Mieczan said...

He sounds like a great guy and that bear is so adorable...I think you guys are perfect for eachother....You totally should give it a chance...Kisses my lovely and have a fun and full of love weekend:)

drollgirl said...

this is fun, and this is exciting, and this is a good thing! maybe take it slow and just see what happens! i will have my fingers crossed for you! :)

have a great weekend!

Melissa Blake said...

I'm just getting caught up on your blog! I'm so glad things are looking up for you! xoxo

CJ sounds really cute!

Dionne said...

I hope it works well for you, hun. And how adorable that he's nervous. I love that he's not all cocky and over-confidant, that's a huuuuge turn-off.

BonBon Rose Girls Kristin said...

Fingers crossed things work out for you crazy kids?

tess said...

just tagged you to answer some fun questions in my latest post!

Sammy V said...

Love Bob Dylan...beautiful song.

Claire Kiefer said...

good luck with your new man! I hope it keeps getting better & better . . .

Sheri, RN said...

I'm so happy for you! A real adult relationship is what you totally deserve, and he seems like a great guy! ::hugs::

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Barry said...

It would be oh-so easy for me to say just take it as it goes and try not to over-analyze things at this point. Because if I were in your shoes I'd be feeling the exact same way as you (the difference being of course that I wouldn't be dating a guy. lol!)

I'm staying positive that things will go well between you two. You know I adore you Mel, you deserve so much more than the guys you've met. I'll be following along, as always. :)

x

S and O said...

you know what, I have loved that song ever since I first heard it and I must agree with you it is a kickass song :)

great post <3

xoxo
Olivia

Amber Lucas A Mused Blog said...

:) I like how you just grabbed and kissed him. I really hope this works out! Keep us updated!


Amber
ambersmouthwash

Amanda said...

sounds like a great guy! have fun! I love the care bear lol :)

Amy V said...

First, any guy that plays bob dylan is a WINNER in my book! This whole post was way too cute for words. So happy for you. :)

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Audrey Allure said...

Aw, that sounds so sweet! And yes, definitely give him a chance - he seems like he's treating you really well! :)

Tayebug said...

I am so glad you're going to take the risk. You will never know unless you try. He sounds sweet and you two sound like you like eachother a lot. So don't let nerves or fears get in the way.

I found your blog through How To... and I love it. When I have time, I plan to do some more reading.

xoxo
livinghappyhealthy365.blogspot.com

angel6033 said...

sounds like a great second date, I am glad that you are happy and have finally met someone that so far so good :)! I wish you the best with this relationship girly! About time you let the times change...

Sierra said...

Glad the second date went well and just take one step at a time, sounds like things are going well. Glad you are taking things slowly and you will know it if it seems right. Ha ha that is funny about the relations with your family members working together, but don't let that get in your way of dating each other. :)

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